Issue 005 · January 2013
Cover by Hunter Payne
Introduction
It's 2013 and society has devolved into post-apocalyptic madness.
Here is the latest issue of Clearly Stated.
I Get Anxiety
Selected gchats from December 13, 2012 - January 3, 2013 Written by Benjamin Loeffler on January 3, 2013
Arranged by Jmar Atienza on January 8, 2013
i get anxiety when youre not on chat
thats fucked up even if youre not really
. . t h e r e . .
its better to see your name
i worry that maybe somethings happened
like you are
. . d e a d . .
or maybe you spilled coffee on yr server
youre not funny or cute
i wonder how many years that will work for you
. . u g h . .
i have fucking g g g g gg dandruffff
. . u g l h y . .
pijghqerge gqelk rg kefklghqdfk lg kldwfghw dfgkl fl
gdfjl gjkl efg kla klgjks fgk df ljgsdf klgdfksglk asklsdfl
kgdsf lkg lksdfg
lkdf
klgdf
lkgl
kdfgl kdf
lgkdfg
dfklngsdfkgkajdf sdf klgd fkgdk g kf klgfklfgkl
gf klgf
klgfk gf
lkgf
klfg
lkgf
lgfkl gf
klgf lkgf
lkgf
klgfl
kfg
lkgf lkg klf lkgf klgf klgfl kgflk
g klfgl kgl kgf kfgkl gf klfglkgfkl
gflkfglk gf lkfgl kfgl kfgl kgf klgfl kgf glfkg flkgf lkgfl kfglkhrt khr
gr gr r e .......................... ........ ..... rere re r er
e r r re rer e re r rr r r rr r r rr
r rr r dd d
d dd d
v v v v
okay people are starting to get suspicious
theyre worried im typing too fast
my crush just liked me on facebook
Eddie Murphy Charlie
Written by Blank White on January 1, 2013
Arranged by Ella Collier on January 10, 2013
Eddie Murphy Charlie
Murphy Wayne Brady Cedric
The Entertainer Dave
Chappelle Bill Cosby
Redd Foxx Richard
Pryor David Alan
Grier Arsenio
Hall DL Hughley
Phil Lamarr Martin
Lawrence Chris Tucker
Chris Rock Bernie
Mac Sinbad Kel
Mitchell Kenan Thompson
Chuck Nice Patrice
O’neal George Wallace
Damon Wayans Marlon
Wayans Katt
Williams Sherrod Small
Watching You Online
Written by Anonymous on January 4, 2013
Arranged by Moon Temple on January 10, 2013
watching you
online
is
dangerous
but only
dangerous for
me
i think
i know.
exactly who you are.
and while im probably wrong
and overguessing
its a
dangerous
who
for me
i always have trouble with a perceived need any sort of dark screen.
wanting? or?
do you ever feel that its easier to watch someone through the screenkind
and just project
your needs
onto them
i think its too easy
so
maybe
better
and worse
like if i have
a boy
on a screen
to project
if hes darker
than me
its easier
do you sometimes look at people next to you and wish they were far away
not
to get away from them
but for the feeling
of staring at them
through a screen
you can only convince
them of what you want with words
or maybe your image but sometimes
touchin
g is
just too
easy maybe is what im trying to
say we just sometimes
Hard Studying College
Written by Matt Takaichi on January 7, 2013
Arranged by Mauzy Virginia on January 8, 2013
At The Weird Bar
Written by Audrey Mardavich on December 31, 2012
Arranged by Chief McFrank on January 8, 2013
Add Water To Flour
Written by Jayinee Basu on January 7, 2013
Arranged by Molly O'Brien on January 9, 2013
1) Add water to flour and salt
2) mix...
3) ...until...
4) ...a fleshy dough forms...
5) ...A YEASTY GOLEM OF YOUR OWN!
.................to give breath to a form...........
......................to pull away and pout.........
.......disobeying your laws.........................
...............carrying your fire...................
.....................further and further away.......
There Are Certainly Definitely
Livejournal spam comment selected by Ian Aleksander Adams Written by Pjadgaj on December 30, 2012
Arranged by Shane Jesse Christmass on January 2, 2013
there are certainly definitely actually
a lot of lots of plenty of loads
of numerous
a whole lot of a number
of a variety of quite a lot of
details particulars
like that to take into consideration
that is
a that may be
a that could be
a great nice point level
to bring convey deliver
carry up i offer
supply provide
the thoughts ideas above
as general common basic normal
inspiration
but however clearly there are
questions like
the just like
the one you bring convey
deliver carry up
where the place
the most important an important
crucial a very powerful thing
factor will be shall be might be
will probably be can be will likely be
working in honest trustworthy sincere good faith
i dont know
if best greatest finest practices have emerged
around round things issues like that
but however i am im sure
positive certain that your job is clearly
identified recognized as a fair a good game
both each boys and girls girls and boys
feel really feel
mail the impact
Now Who's Been Saying
Written by Shane Jesse Christmass on January 1, 2013
Arranged by Jered Mercer on January 8, 2013
I'm Really Sorry
Written by Dorothy Howard on January 6, 2012
Arranged by Josué Rivera on January 14, 2013
i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ m@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ l@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ l@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ y@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ y@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ h@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ g@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ d@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ l@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ n@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ g@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ h@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ h@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ n@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ k@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ p@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ d@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ u@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ w@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ h@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ l@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ y@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ u@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ b@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ h@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ w@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ n@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ m@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ f@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ d@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ n@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ k@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ y@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ u@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ q@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ u@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ n@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ d@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ v@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ k@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ d@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ n@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ d@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ f@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ d@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ y@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ u@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ m@@@@@@@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@@@@ b@@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@@ l @@@@@@@@@@@@ l@@@@@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@@@@ n@@@@@@@@@@@ d@@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@@ o@@@@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@@@ t@@@@@@@@@ i@@@@@@@@@ l@@@@@@@@@ l@@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@@ s@@@@@@@@ u@@@@@@@ a@@@@@@@ r@@@@@@@ e@@@@@@ a@@@@@@ n@@@@@@ o@@@@@ r@@@@@ c@@@@ h@@@@ a@@@@ r@@@ d@@@ o@@@ f@@@ l@@ i@@ m@ e@ s@ t h a t m y m o u t h i s t r y i n g t o g e t f r e a k y w i t h a n d i m g o i n g t o o p e n a l e m o n a d e s t a n d i n y o u r o r c h a r d a n d i r e a l l y l o v e y o u r p e a c h e s w a n t t o s h a k e y o u r t r e e a n d i m a s m o k e r i m a t o k e r i m a m i d n i g h t j o k e r a n d i p l a y m y m u s i c i n t h e s u n a n d i m a p i c k e r i m a g r i n n e r i m a l o v e r i m a s i n n e r a n d i s u r e d o n t w a n t t o h u r t n o o n e
Man What A Life
Written by Ella Collier on December 28, 2012
Arranged by Venessa Marie Villarreal on January 11, 2013
"MAN! What a life?"
The one guy says.
to The other, who picks his nose as he listens, and flicks the booger off his thumb.
and Into the air a girl looks, at the two men.
and:::crinkles:::
Her nose, You know?
what She's thinking "Nose picking is gross!" her face...tells all.
Next to her a "mother" is cradling her new born baby. Who is maybe two months old?
and Very tiny.
(The mother looks)...Like she knows what she is doing!!!
Not that the baby appears to be needing anything.
B-A-B-Y
yawns the girl next to the mother.
"Smiles and says precious"
the mother responds,
"HOW'D YOU KNOW THAT'S HER NAME GIRL!?!?"
:::shrugs:::
(She hadn't thought)
"The baby's name was precious? Kind of a dumb name actually..."
GIRL!!! Saw a movie called 'Precious'. Once, the main character was an obese black teenaged girl...With an abusive mother... GIRL!!! Watched it because...OPRAH...endorsed it!
MAN!!! his Picking his nose again???
She scolds him.
(Silently with her eyes)
and thinks, "About how many boogers are on the floor?"
"How many boogers are in the city?!"
"HOW MANY BOOGERS THERE ARE IN THE WORLD!!! IN THE UNIVERSE!!!"
"And so?"
on All this thought about boogers has made her feel...
:::NAUSEOUS:::
A man in a white coat comes out just in time and calls.
"Her! Into his office!"
Girl stands up and moves.
"TOWARDS...THE...ROOM!!!"
Guidelines Is A Game
Selections of Clearly Stated guidelines appropriated by Quinn Maubach Written by Ian Aleksander Adams on January 2, 2013
Arranged by Dorothy Howard on January 10, 2013
@ gui_de_lines
#i's a game
@whereone_
person writes text#
@withno_
"formatting"
@orpun
#ctuation#
@suchas
"in a text"
@editor(the)
#y work?
@madeusingjustthelettersoftheenglishalphabet
###andspace####
@’s_not_even
"line breaks"
@a_secondperson
#appliesform#
@atting
inserts punctuation!!!
@_____andwhitespace____
_____________they_______
are____not_____allowed__
@to_re:
"arrange any letters"
@o
#r words they are??
@notallowed.
##to add or delete#
@anyalphabetical_characters
(thepeoplewhoare)##
@_interestedinthiskindofgame
#are_also_often. . .
@interested_in_pushing_
boundaries
@T*h***i--s*G$A$M$E$*i--s
#aboutseeing
@HOW_CREATIVE_YOU_CAN_GET?
within?
@very_specificboundaries
it.
@i_'s_like_most_games_in_that_
#afulllistoftherules
@tips_andan_example
"so you can smash out a pile?"
@of
##letters
@for_now
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
@by_sending
"un-punctuated???"
@andifyoua(L!)s(O!)wantab(L!)
##this is usually a one-for-one transaction##
@you_may
##select a :)
@blockofappropriatedtext
"but" "you" "may" arrange"
@if
#you
@desire
#to
@do
#this.
I'm Screaming Can You
Written by Venessa Marie Villarreal on January 2, 2013
Arranged by Austin Islam on January 11, 2013
i'm screaming, can you hear me, i'm yelling
at the top of my lungs 'why can't you h
ear me' or maybe you can?
maybe you don't care, maybe it's how it should be
but i can't stop yelling your name, i can't stop
feeling your voice, tasting your sm
ile all i want is
to look into your hea
rt / connect with your soul
every time i feel close every time i project my voice: you turn away
i have the worst ti
ming but i can think of that now
time is just a figment of someone other's imagination
it's holding me back, it holds us all back
my heart skipped a beat just now. i heard a remnant of your laugh
i saw a glimpse of your smile and it skipped
this troublesome burden of love is a curse, it haunts us all
it tears through our walls and sneaks beyond our borders
invading infecting and tormenting yet i am still yelling,
'your name', reaching for your heart but something pulls me back
something stops me from reaching for it, is it you
are you stopping me? i'm caught, caught between two hearts
one reaching and connected to mine and one that i am reaching for
but it keeps just out of my grasp... it's all timing i guess
time is my burden too, love and time everything has its place
and it seems mine is set, i have no more time left to reach for you
or i will drag those connected to me into a hell that they should never know
but my heart has a beat (a small hidden beat) only for you
always you, it will skip when i hear you
flutter when you laugh - sink when you're gone.. time..
time never changes it burdens us all and with it love right by its side
like poison in an open wound it seeps, it spreads
i welcome this poison it makes me feel human it makes me feel
alive
Computer Age
Written by Miekal And on December 31, 2012
Arranged by Blank White on January 10, 2013
҉c҉o҉m҉p҉u҉t҉e҉r҉
⌚age⌚
~~wrought
(the) bookless [[turntable]]
dowager of disbelief
enters asylum:
"pattyknock, ok?" past;
BC/AD
& into next no
cyptonic hierarchy (?)
"cuz! be-cuss!"
THE THINKERS RESPOND IN PART
(ingots of ideas)
.rode frenzy﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
░░░▒▓vapor░░░▒▓░░░▒▓░░░▒▓░░░▒▓░░░▒▓░░░
░░░▒▓░░░▒▓░░░▒▓░░░▒▓blowtorch░░░▒▓░░░▒▓░░░▒▓░░░
﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
"Similar to 16th century paintings..."
"...all in one or not at all"
A quest reminder:
1.fro
2.raja
Spinster-lack
nﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒ
ﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒ
ﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒi
ﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒf
ﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒﾒt
ail, rose, spleen, canister.
oceans away♒♒♒♒♒♒♒...the bottle dropped
(or given with pretense)
probability forecast: DRAMA
"unless restive toxicity..."
clarion﹏
﹏bugle
snort; for heretics: a die red
stone-piled claustrophobia, gap atween weeds
(laid brood)
"3 depletes 4..."
Tester, dip into caulk. Badness, neck a foe.
Lap wag, ado game.
Peace told Funky: "you're done."
☮
Ambivalentchoristers denigrate, lack soothsaying credentials, up till
KNOW=OPTIMA
Killdragon carried fears, a fortune tune.
Bardic despondency yells: "Careless!"
Referent?: My The.
҉c҉o҉m҉p҉u҉t҉e҉r҉
⌚age⌚
~~wrought
(the) bookless [[turntable]]
dowager of disbelief
enters asylum:
"pattyknock, ok?" past;
BC/AD
& into next no
cyptonic hierarchy (?)
"cuz! be-cuss!"
THE THINKERS RESPOND IN PART
I Don't Understand Contemporary
Reddits comment selected by Mauzy Virginia on January 3, 2012 Written by reddit.com on January 2, 2013
Arranged by Chris Barker on January 12, 2013
I don't understand contemporary art.
At all.
I remember going to the Guggenheim one year,
(when I was in high school)
and there was a piece of wood
with a three inch piece of old rope
nailed to it,
on the wall.
This was considered one of the
"signature pieces of the time."
I COULD HAVE MADE THAT SHIT IN MY GARAGE.
If it's not little beads,
arranged to look like a 16 bit nintendo character,
it must fucking suck, RIGHT?
Its made by an "artist"
and called "art,"
so it must have "value," right?
YOU SHOULD HAVE PASSED GAS ON TOP OF IT,
AND SAID,
"NOW ITS FART!!"
I upvoted,
in hopes that people can look at this and say,
"THAT IS BARELY FUCKING ART!"
"and entirely STUPID it's at the Guggenheim!"
(If so i had a few similar experiences there, photographer here)
Nothing depresses me more than art,
such as this,
that makes more money for the artist,
in one creation,
than I do in a WHOLE YEAR.
If it has to be accompanied by a lengthy explanation,
IT ISN'T ART. (to me, anyway)
I was at a museum in D.C.–
cant remember which one–
several years ago.
In the middle of the room
was very large,
unfinished plywood box,
with the lid fallen into the box–
very rough cut,
stuff not polished,
or finished,
or ANYTHING.
It looked like it was the box
that they moved some large statue,
or something else, in.
In the process of taking a picture
of something on the wall,
I leaned up against the box.
The security guard rushed over
and sternly told me to move way
from the "art."
I almost laughed,
thinking it was a joke at first.
~TL;DR~
I realized I dislike contemporary art in Philly.
Reminds me of this artwork,
ANY HOME DEPOT DUDE COULD DO.
I'm avoiding doing gallery art,
because I feel that even if it does have "meaning",
people will ignore it.
For modern art shit,
I'm pretty sure I've had more emotions
while I've TAKEN A SHIT
than some modern artist have
while making ALL THEY CAN–
that's "art".
"Contemporary art."
(lol)
AND THAT ISN'T EVEN A NEW CONCEPT.
If some of you thought it was,
just look at Duchamp's "fountain."
Art fags have been art fagging it up for a long time.
"Why should skill and practice
be a prerequisite for creating art?"
IT'S NOT!!
It SHOULD be a prerequisite for being
"renowned" for your art.
This sculpture sold for $1043 million,
a few years back at auction.
Just think about that!
I've learned the hard way
whenever you're in an art studio,
NEVER sit down, man.
I have to become a minimalist artist.
FINE ART MAKES ME WANT TO JUMP OUT OF A WINDOW.
I just cant understand
how the whole trend of basic objects
taken out of context
and becoming "art" has been used
over
AND OVER AGAIN
since Marcel Duchamp signed a toilet,
almost 100 years ago.
It was an interesting idea in 1917,
but in 2013?!?!
After the same idea
has been used THOUSANDS OF TIMES?!?!
ITS INFURIATING.
Idk, top end fine art is generally
reeeaaaly
fucking
SHIT.
Now, not that by any stretch is it ALL terrible.
Someone probably worked really hard
squeezing that turd out.
You want to make modern art?
Do this:
get a paper plate,
and jack off onto it,
so the semen gets in the center of the plate.
And get some ketchup and squirt it
around the semen,
in a circle,
so that it looks kind of like this.
Finally,
when they ask you what it means,
say, "Its something about how the natural
is being surrounded by the unnatural,"
or some crap like that.
BOOM!
"Modern art."
Because you don't have an art degree,
that says any piece of shit
I glue to another piece of shit
is worth THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS.
That's "art."
It looks like something
I would put together as a rush job,
in an afternoon,
to be a platform for something that was definitely art.
Dumbass art experts!
NO ONE KNOWS WHAT ART IS,
because its fucking subjective.
You sit on a throne of LIES.
(Clearly, that's an upside down cheesecake)
In Order To Exist In
Written by Codi Suzanne Oliver on January 2, 2013
Arranged by Alexandra Naughton on January 8, 2013
in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to
exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence
within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any
capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity in order to exist in any capacity i or whatever focal point of my collected thoughts actions and body can claim a tangible being must embrace monstrosity and destroy every influence within me that regards nature as an inherently superior quality of spirit thought life or entity
I Am Attracted To You
Written by Moon Temple on January 2, 2013
Arranged by Kcirred Reswob on January 13, 2013
I am attracted to you.
(in theory)
Cry in my bed.
(for no distinct reason)
Can I lay on the floor?
For several hours?
(feeling nothing)
and then stand up.
And look out my bedroom window?
and feel slightly guilty.
For feeling nothing?
Can I look at pictures?
Of my ex boyfriend?
And?
Try to remember.
What it feels like?
To feel something.
Something explosive?
Can I look at a pretty girl?
That gets more attention?
From people, I feel it is important.
(to receive attention)
From?
(and feel vaguely jealous)
and then?
Feel slightly guilty.
And disgusted with myself.
Because.
The only thing I seem to be able to feel
is vague.
(Jealousy)
Cry in my bed.
For no distinct reason.
Can I chat with older men?
In other countries.
On gmail chat?
And get naked on webcam
and feel nothing
Cry in my bed.
For no distinct reason.
Imagine arms…
Around me?
Hug people I am attracted to
In theory?
Can you convince me?
To feel for you?
Explosively.
I am attracted to you.
(in theory)
Can I pick at myself?
In a bathroom?
At a party.
And?
Feel terrified.
Of everyone.
But you can.
You hold me!
In the dark!
While it is raining?
Cry in my bed!
(for no distinct reason)
Can you get angry and yell at me?!
For?
Talking to an older man
in another country
…on gmail chat.
And?
Getting naked.
(on webcam)
And?
Feeling nothing.
Can you ask me to feel something?
For you?
Can I feel something for you?
Can I feel something for you?
Can I have your permission?
I am attracted to you.
(in theory)
The Deep Bass Of Dub Step
Written by Jered Mercer on December 31, 2007
Arranged by Miekal And on December 31, 2012
| the | deep | bass | of | dub | step |
| makes | me | feel | so | much | especially |
| when | it | drops | but | i | don't |
| know | if | they | know | what | they |
| are | doing | to | me | because | I |
| can't | always | dance | the | way | i |
| want | to | when | i | feel | that |
| feeling | it | makes | me | feel | it's |
| like | a | bird | in | a | cage |
| or | a | tiger | in | the | woods |
| with | a | fence | high | enough | for |
| it | not | to jump | over | and | it's |
| all | around | him | drum | and | bass |
| are | the | only | two | necessary | components |
| to | real | happiness | or | any | kind |
| of | motion | really | i | can't | stress |
| enough | the | importance | of | drummers | and |
| bassists | as | community | members | of | high |
| import | they | really | know | their | stuff |
| i | can | see | them | being | heads |
| of | states | but | for | now | they |
| can | settle | for | me | being | a |
| beat | head |
Wow So Ian A Facebook
Written by Andrew Prassas on January 2, 2013
Arranged by Lexi Roberts on January 10, 2013
@WowSoIan: “@afacebookfriend: by the way i will abbreviate facebook as fb from here on”
@out: WHO IS SOON TO BE AN IRL FRIEND!?
@idobelieve: ask Ed!
@meto: write things without
@punctuation: so...i said OK i will write without
@punctuation: for your zine i am at a bar café thing right now typing
@listeningto: HOLLAGRAMZ ATLANTEAN TECHNO MIX
@Itwasmy: favorite mix of the year?
@ittalksaboutcool: ...theosophical stuff.
@andhasdopebeats: so new years just happened it was a trip NO I WAS NOT LITERALLY TRIPPING ON PSYCHEDELICS
@Ididthatalotof: “@thatthisyearthough: i essentially have “HPPD” now but i really enjoy it but i wish i could claim disability for it”
@i: HIGHLY recommend changa.. its like...smokeable?
@ayahuascaandis: super gentle and spiritually uplifting and balancing? …vibes
@i: met the space queen
@feminine: beautiful goddess lady?
@andrealizedthat: my spirit is not from the earth
@weallcomefromthestars: anyways... this new years i spent good time with friends they got me “into” big freedias show
@indallas: i dont know what i think about that “whole performance”
@ifeltlikeitwas: a strange zone for white college kids of loose sexual boundaries: to have an open space
@toactlike: black people in New Orleans!!!
@withouthavingto: spend any time around irl black people besides “B”?
@twno: HATE ON BIG FREEDIA
@iappreicateandadmire: what is happening..?
@butatthesametime: i have serious reservations about the context “blah blah blah blah.”
@Thequeerblackman: *performing onstage* (and a few other black people) “it seemed hella safe, and the beats were way too repetitive and just, you know. it was just a hyped event thing”
@butigottosp: end good time with good friends as new years countdown happened
@myfriend: who is a dope dj!?
@gavemea: *kiss on the cheek* and *i return Ed*
@ittohim: no homo lol but we’re both boy lesbians. i do believe in my imagination that means you have a feminine spirit and like girls a whole lot?
@Forsomerea: son, gay dudes like me a lot. im not complaining its flattering but i wish girls would hit me up more
@butnowtheyareiguess: this girl friended me on fb. no friends in common on fb. Ok.
@but: you. (re: hot?)
@soillacceptthefriend: request all of Christ! Ma’s eve and whatnot: she was hitting me up on fb chat
@whatsyour: favorite christmas movie: Teeeheee Jingle All The Way
@definitely: i admire arnold schzwarzeneggar
@awholelot: sin = bad
@wasgoodinthattoo: BY THE WAY my favorite actor is nicholas cage……………………anyways……
@hi: “speed” chases are cool, i ended up “meeting up” with the “girl” after “the loft party.” that was dope.
@dancingfriends: djing, lots of weed, smoking and drinking, and i did my usual crazy dancing but yeah shes all “come over come over come over come over”
@multipletexts: ...like that throughout the night?
@so: i showed up at her friends apartment and we hit it off but then her friend flips his shit..
@andisall: i need to go to sleep
@andhestarted: *KICKING OVER CHAIRS AND ACTING LIKE A TANTRUM CHILD BABY MAN*
@andwerealllike: ok you can go to sleep. We’re not keeping you up
@buttherealproblemwas: ...he didnt want us having sex at his apartment. so he kicked us out new years eve. *really drunk* so i drove her german luxury auto
@mobile: seriously WHO THE FUCK is this girl i like her this is very strange and surreal and kind of nice
@backtomyplace: i told her it was a shit hole apartment and i have shit everywhere. “i want more wine” she said. i didnt have a bottle opener so she smashed the bottle in my sink glass. SHATTERED. EVERYWHERE.
@andtheleftover: wine in the bottom of the wine bottle. i poured into a small gl(ass).
@topochicobottle: because i am a gentleman, this girl is really cool.
@Ithoughtsoyeah: WHAT DO YOU EXPECT!? HA.
@ppenedit: did we knock Ed over!?
@Mytarotdeckand: a card came up ace of pentacles, “i bet thats a bad one” she said and i was like nah there are no bad cards all obstacles can be overcome lets have more sex.
@okwe: woke up the next morning and just kind of talked shit to each other it was nice
@i: said shes like lou anne from king of the hill, which i did not intend as a mean thing i meant it as a compliment...humor:/
@notasabadthingand: she got all huffy and sort of punched me on the chest which i like a lot but i have a feeling she likes doing that and starting shit which is a lot of fun anyways
@shetoldme: im like bart simpson. which i am. and i liked that.
@wellshes: “coming” over tonight?
@sothatsnice: she told me i needed to clean up all the bottles so i did (domesticity)
@wherewasi: hmmmmmmmmm lost my train of thought. ok yeah ace of pentacles next?
@days: he sends me a text, “ace of pentacles is about new beginnings and opportunities”
Fuck You Love Me Be
Written by Chief McFrank on December 30, 2012
Arranged by Audrey Mardavich on January 11, 2013
fuck you - love me / be free version 1.0
starthtml0000000105 endhtml0000003522
startfragment0000002292 endfragment0000003486
oh look, im free
just kidding FUCK THIS mom/dad
come at me bro
tell me I have to do something
it's bullshit, you know it
i'm moving two-thousand miles away
i'm packing up my car and driving
all day and all night
until I reach that glorious fucking sanctuary
of peace/redemption
self-actualization and other big words
that mean only :: GOOD THINGS
even when bad things say HELLO I just don't care about this place at present
it's not helping me / it's not HURTING ME
but it's definitely not fucking helping me
it's just encouraging me to stay THE SAME
and never go beyond
I need something new / I need some danger
I need some uncertainty and adversity but most of all
I need a HOME
that enables me to face THAT SHIT head on
I'm breaking out of this
I'm getting mine no doubts this time
no second guesses no stutters or side-stepping
I'm just gonna fucking DO IT
because that's the point of LIFE
at least one of them you gotta be able to say THIS IS ME
and I'm gonna be it because I'm me
and I don’t give A FUCK if it's weird / non-respectable
or some other hollow bullshit adjective
I'm me go fuck yourself
but love me because
I love you for being you
Repetition Breeds Relaxation
Written by Lexi Roberts on January 6, 2013
Arranged by Ian Aleksander Adams on January 7, 2013
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
r\e\petit\i\on bree\d\s relaxatio\n\ repetition breeds
re\l\axati\o\n repet\i\tion breeds\ \relaxation
rep\e\titio\n\ breeds\ \relaxation \r\epetition breeds
rela\x\ation\ \repetit\i\on breeds r\e\laxation
repet\i\tion \b\reeds r\e\laxation re\p\etition breeds
relaxa\t\ion r\e\petitio\n\ breeds rel\a\xation
repetit\i\on br\e\eds rel\a\xation repe\t\ition breeds
relaxati\o\n rep\e\tition \b\reeds relax\a\tion
repetitio\n\ bree\d\s relax\a\tion repeti\t\ion breeds
relaxation\ \repet\i\tion br\e\eds relaxat\i\on
repetition \b\reeds\ \relaxat\i\on repetiti\o\n breeds
relaxation r\e\petit\i\on bree\d\s relaxatio\n\
repetition br\e\eds r\e\laxatio\n\ repetition\b\reeds
\ relaxation
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
It's Almost Game Time
Promotional email selected for Clearly Stated by Ian Aleksander Adams Written by delivery.com on January 7, 2013
Arranged by Codi Suzanne Oliver on January 10, 2013
"i, tsa"
l m
ost "game ;)" time & and & you
ve go@t b'ig'&&&&&&&& pl!!!!!!!!!!
an*s ^_^ in volv@ "i" -_- ng...
s#itt!!!!!! <_< ... "i" -________-' ...ng
o......
n.........
"you" :/ r...
co "uch!" / an*$ "d-watching" ;)
foot
balllet & "u"(:\))))))))))))))))))))
\m/
//.
........[a-k]............ -------',-e
"y?" ??????? <(',:-\)---|------<
^o^
urn
"i" >:((((((((
gh!!!!!
t
ali ttl ------e-------e------
as$
(i.e. @rby'$)
bringing you d i nne r& a&n&d & "d-rinks" ;)
"we" @____@ ha!!!
veev
er……y?
'thing' :) "you" n-:<
ee d fort 'o'
'night's "game ;)'
&and&
bye!
very 'thing'!
>_>' "we" <_<'
'<_< "me" '>_>
a........... n_p iz
z@@@@@@@@@@@@@a@@@@@@@@@@@@@@w@@@@@@@@@
"i" >__< ng!!!
sandboo8
"ze" -_- or "de" ',:-r
"fro" =======>>>>m====>>>>"you/r" .____.
f|avor it.
e-local :)
s-:
pot
sand.......
"we" >>>>>:(((((((!!!!!!
llbri
ng…
#youth!!!!!! ^_^!!! #eess!!! #ent.
'"i" (…*_*) alsso yo'
```ucan````en````
#joyth!!! :) :\
"e-game ;)" no.
#twat.
#ching! $$$$ "the-"
game ;)
pizza and beer
ta<<<<ste^
#good (+: ^-^ $$$ 'eve'.
nif.
"you're not a football fan????!!!!" >:(
In Service Requests
Written by Nicholas Rutkaus on January 7, 2013
Arranged by Skye Kade on January 13, 2013
in servicer e quests create ana
me field lock it and make work
flow that pulls name regard
less of project orc on tact
last first drop dow nme nude
fault to sync up in
stall status project sands how time as in
stall calendarcr mop rev row
41 close
as los top tions fun dingty peop
pre visions work flow smarke
ting vie ws and char
tsch an get a border addre ferra land
referrer thin gind ate sales
responsibility complete work
flow ad dcrew
l e a d t o i n s t a l l f o r m
Paper Munching Frog Face
Written by Skye Kade on January 4, 2013
Arranged by Rin Alexander Ascher on January 12, 2013
Paper munching frog face.
"Temple elders! Quit it!" Slither overture. Air leak, brown scales, mixolydian. (Probably NOT vegan. Totally not human.)
For seven moments: twinkle elk-less, blue hoodie diary.
(passcode: varsity "bruiser.")
Fist brigade! Hermit crab. Deluxe options.
Choose halogen bulbs and the evening.
Snare print skirt,
rendered by blood,
looms.
Isn't that every nation? Yes, dear? Then why do we choose?
A nemesis......huh!triple hard. Rille~
Given for a double-dog-dare: wings aplenty.
From jet infinity, "rock-and-roll" zombie flick, origin, new gene-huntress.
Meek.
Tits off.
The bat trip.
Around the room, to handgun formats (and pardon our dust-boots) briefs.
That's it.
Get the leaves. Now, dunk the jar hooks. Little undulations...totally.
Mailing this manuscript,
because achievable purpose 'booya.'
Reptile,
mirth egg,
breaker,
epithet,
communist.
Dogs: literal dogs/canis domesticus, with manifesto.
"piety uss, Appendage For Five Hands....."
Fortissimo! Jerk! Complacent!
League, that's my family!! Identical plurals! Priceless dolls!
(Queen of queens?)
Of grave-wave anime high school stupor,
Lollipop Bog,
A "no-driving-elephant-trance."
Her mad scene was abstracted pathos that fell so sick of him, undead, my lady.
Decay.
Attack cutoff.
#Envelopeandgobs.
Of skin build.
Segmented panic attacks.
I, who purely hedonist years (physical time,) form was was infinite sort.
Heart: ultimate gels.
Not skimmed, but wide known firebird. Crawl under, the smoke, definitely afraid.
Sans pipestem legs, venom and steam. Possum mob.
ooh..spooky portrait (to someone.)
Fix away. Empty.
Ran hardstyle, scripts, purple chirps.
Always die, Dying Swan.
I did not leave, I take them like a good girl, these rotten Red drugs. This glorified "zoo." Fresh with scented malady-goliath. Box adder nine/two. By that name: Burlap Burlesque! IN THEATRES.
Stitching detail, costume/set design. Impossible dances that speak, like talking daggers, gristle.
Massive headache. I hate 'nothing' stage combat. Just finish out this one.
Shred-Ride private concert. Zero traction vapor,
whore cable,
flip$$$side,
aid gay adventure,
figuring, not that way, gutter brain.
Not that that's low, thought but we're talking old words now. Such expression! Golden Anniversary Suspects!
The seven rhein wine singers glaze baby deer tint. How smart!
....torch block and case chalkboards away for a week. Few value SWORD BATTLE over DEBATE (and for safe reasons.)
minute death.
Challenges And Manups
Written by Jeremy Johnston on October 14, 2011
Arranged by Quinn Maubach on January 9, 2013
CHALLENGES!!!!!!! AND MAN-UPS!!!!!!!
IF A PLAYER RECEIVES A manfraction AND ~feels~ THAT OUR SERVER DID A BAD JOB OF REALIZING THE REASONS THEY USED A ~girly~ WORD, OR IF THEY ~feel~ THEY WERE UNFAIRLY GIVEN A manfraction BY ONE OF THEIR friends, THEY CAN
CHALLENGE!!!!!!! THE loss OF POINTS. ADDITIONALLY, IF THEY HAVE THEIR MAN-CARD TAKEN AWAY, THEY CAN TRY TO MAN UP!!!!!!! AND COUNTER THE manfraction BY DOING SOMETHING
EXTRA-MANLY!!!!!!! TO EARN THEIR CARD BACK.
CHALLENGES!!!!!!! ALLOW PLAYERS TO FIGHT!!!!!!! AGAINST AN AUTOMATIC manfraction BY GIVING AN EXPLANATION AND ASKING THEIR friends TO COUNTER IT, SO IF OUR SERVER FLAGS THE mantonym ~*~kittens~*~ IN THE SENTENCE “MORE VIDEO GAMES!!!!!!! SHOULD HAVE A WEAPON!!!!!!! THAT SHOOTS!!!!!!! FLAMING!!!!!!! ~*~kittens~*~ AT THE ENEMY,” THE PLAYER CAN FLAG THE manfraction FOR REVIEW FROM THEIR friends WITH MAN-CARDS. IF ENOUGH AGREE, THEN THE CHALLENGE!!!!!!! GOES THROUGH.
MAN-UPS!!!!!!! ARE A WAY OF EARNING BACK A USER’S MAN-CARD IF IT GETS TAKEN AWAY BY A MANUAL manfraction. IF SOMEONE GETS THEIR MAN-CARD TAKEN AWAY FOR ANY REASON, THEY CAN COUNTER BY DOING SOMETHING
EXTRA-MANLY!!!!!!! FOR EXAMPLE: IF DURING A LUNCH conversation IT COMES UP THAT A friend HASN’T EVER WATCHED A BASEBALL!!!!!!! GAME IN PERSON, THEY MIGHT lose THEIR MAN-CARD. IF THEY’D LIKE TO THEY CAN IMMEDIATELY COMPENSATE BY ORDERING A DOUBLE
BACON CHEESEBURGER!!!!!!! WITH
BACON!!!!!!! AS A SIDE, OR BY RECOUNTING THE PREVIOUS EVENING THEY DRANK A COLD BEER!!!!!!! WHILE THEY WERE IN A HOT SHOWER. EVEN THOUGH THEY DON’T NECESSARILY NEED TO DO SOMETHING THAT RELATES TO THE manfraction, A
MAN-UP!!!!!!! IS AN EXTREMELY MANLY!!!!!!!
ACTION!!!!!!! THAT PROVES THEY STILL DESERVE THEIR MAN-CARD.
I Keep Receiving
Written by Molly O'Brien on January 6, 2013
Arranged by Jayinee Basu on January 14, 2013
i keep receiving the mo!
S.T.P.O. (tent emails)
S.T.O.P. (love letter in youtube commen)
T.S.T.O. (p-mystery man leather jacke)
T.S.T.O. (pall mystery men wear leather jacket)
S.S.T.O. (pican only assume you wear leather jack-e)
T.S.S.T. (op start thinking about hypothetical quest ion)
S.S.T.O. (p-like what if you could remember every minute of every party you've ever attended)
S.T.O.P. (birthday parties bar mitzvahs fir)
S.T.T.I. (me drinking parties dream parties meet the man of your dreams partie)
S.S.W.E. (at inside cool off outside parties stop because then i would be able to remember)
T.H.E.T. (i'me you allegedly made me laugh stop i definitely believe you stop it would ju)
S.T.B.E. (nice to pinpoint the exact Tim)
E.S.T.O. (p-but who wak)
E.S.U.P. (at eight fifteen in the mornin')
G.S.T.O. (p-who wakes up at this time and immediately reads her emails)
Children Are Just People
Written by James Landrum on January 3, 2013
Arranged by Nicholas Rutkaus on January 15, 2013
CHILDREN
are just people
some of them are assholes
some of them are violent
they will give you things you don't want
and say things you don't want to hear
there's not much you can do with children
except fuck them up
or not
people are people and you can't change them
can't change my dad
have tried
holy shit
have tried my mom too
they believe
in GOD
although am not really sure
my dad does
remember crying in the car
asking my mom why she won't divorce him
remember my dad saying he wasn't going to hit me
he never did
sometimes think maybe would have turned out better if he had hit me
wonder if his dad hit him
he cried when his dad died
don't remember ever seeing him cry
remember when he broke the shower door
and there were little beads of safety glass
and water
and blood
everywhere
and Frank Sinatra "Come Fly With Me" was playing
really loudly
in the bedroom
and the water was still running
and when he had to go to the airport early in the morning
but he had taken too much Ambien
at two in the morning
because he couldn't sleep
he can never sleep
and he threw up all over the kitchen floor
and no one else was home
so had to drive him to the airport
think it was Laguardia but maybe it was JFK
have driven them to both
"one day," I said
going over the Tappan Zee
"I'll cross this bridge and you won't even see"
I Was A Fly
Written by Lexi Roberts on January 6, 2013
Arranged by Matt Takaichi on January 13, 2013
i was [a fly]
Reincarnated into a ? ![fly swatter]
i'm not sure [how many wings] ! ? !
i've collected but there’s [a whole jar]
Here of [flies] ! ?
that won’t reincarnate because [you killed them] ! !
with your [bare hands] ! !
i just want [to sleep]? !
i just want to sleep against [flypaper] ? ! !
or maybe press your ? ![cheek]
against it too [stop seriously just stop]??
doing this you're ! ? [damn fly]
well then convince me [otherwise] ! ! !
because [i swear these] !
tattoos [of broken wings] ! ?
on my back [are real] !
and i swear you make [me feel like] ??
I'm 200 times [smaller than you] ! !
well if you don't shut up, i'm going to throw you into a jar like the [fly] that you are. we'll find one big enough and maybe i'll put myself in it you [stupid gnat]!
My Tea Cup
Written by Kcirred Reswob on January 6, 2013
Arranged by Elliot Barbernell on January 12, 2013
MY TEA CUP is full of water
and the water is brown
it is tea,
but it is still water
and there are TWO OTHER CUPS
that are beside me
THEY ARE GLASSES
one of which is filled with water
and the other is dry
and beside THOSE GLASS CUPS there a is a plate
that is dirtied with mayo
and ketchup
and a small oily mark on the rim
that is yellow
because of the curry i use on eggs
the napkin is dirty and folded neatly
it is the most perfect napkin folded
to perfect - it is really neat
it is encyclopedic
the world is interested in it
i can't stop looking over at it now
and italo calvino is sitting beside me
and so is marston bates
and so is my book
and so is santa
santa is holding MY TEA!!
and i still smell the bacon
coming from the kitchen
and the sun just circled
around the milky way recently
just a couple of weeks ago
and it took about
200 MILLION YEARS
for that to happen!
and back then nobody had eyes
when the first symbol was made
and the economist kenneth boulding said
that the an aggregation of similar items
enclosed by a picket fence
of definition with an entrance
by way of birth
AND
A N D
an exit by way of death
was what he said about population
and i THOUGHT
about the street show
and then i THOUGHT
about the farms outside of the city
if there were any farms at all
and the symbol that was made 600 million years ago
was erased
by an imitator
and it was done with carelessness
it was pretentious
IT WAS LOUSY IMITATION!
now that the sun circled the milky way
three
different
times
we now have eyes
and symbols
make more sense! to us now
SO_MUCH_SENSE
that we are dumb to them
because we never got
to EXPERIENCE
what it was like to be blind
and make a symbol
before a symbol
ever
even
existed
If My Room Is Monitored
Written by Jmar Atienza on January 6, 2013
Arranged by Willow Watson on January 14, 2013
if my room is monitored
by security cameras,
then people will s ee
how i,
torture myself
with, o r c h e s t r a l sounds
with, emphasis on
violins,
cellos,
and s axophones
fabricating,
the s addest tones
and
melodies
with, photos of
s u n l i g h t
s preading behind houses
in, temperate countries
or, lush c o n i f e r o u s trees
or, animals
say:
a cat
doing nothing
or perchance
with
photos
of your face
on face book
those little almond eyes, lacerate
my s kin
those soft wet lips, poke
my cheeks
penetrating
deeper into my mouth, then
cutting
my tongue
those hands
comp r e s s me
and brake
my bones
as though wrapping a
chicken in a
plastic
wrap
you leave no air
inside,
and fuse,
the plastic, with the
skin.
to be immobile;
to be dead
Ian OK I Love You
Private email sent to Ian Aleksander Adams, reposted to Facebook
Selected for Clearly Stated by Mauzy Virginia on January 3, 2012 Written by Alison Ozer on January 2, 2013
Arranged by Benjamin Loeffler on January 14, 2013
Selected for Clearly Stated by Mauzy Virginia on January 3, 2012
ian ok i love you and as aM̵ͩͥ̓͌̌̿̿̍ͦ͏̶̮̤͓̳̙̦͓̜̻Ō̢̟̩͇͙̝̖ͫ͗̃̽͆͘͜Ṃ͇̩̲͉̯̰̹͆͋́̊̇ͨand fellow human i am rooting for you i looked at the site and here are my honest reactions this maybe a good exercise for you to lean html but i do not think it is for publication or a porfolio in ie there is a lot of overlap of text too the poems themselves could be arranged better visually each line some lines run on and some have a return http clearlystated net issue 000 table of contents index overlapping with each entry actually this is on most pages so ian in spite of the name this is not clearly presented it maybe a forum for you and rin to express yourselves it is not with broad appeal remember not everything you or someone does says is worthy of sharing ian truly if you are going to apply for jobs in this field i would suggest you clean up your sites this looks like a kids beginning web site for some high school or college course you will likely dismiss my feedback but you can ask a professional hopefully someone who is not just interested in pleasing you with a good job response no matter what you do not a friend i think your comic book site is more visually interesting workable and has layers and focus and colorful content find your best work professional looking photos etc and put that together on a portfolio web site remove the garbage it overwhelms and takes away from a focus on your best work leve your personal journal stuff elsewhere and not as public ian there are reasons for certain design and business marketing practices in use of web i think reading some books on that and marketing could be well worth your time use the tools out there
adobe creative suite ian please get out of room your box your limited circle of fans
you are spread over the net and most of what comes across is a young talented person seekling to find a place with very quickly changing focus not developed meanwhile there are companies hiring and training college grads with less experience than you you have programming and design skills photo skills photo shop etc experience a lot more than many show you can apply yourself to some larger purpose game plan be of service if you stay in your bubble with just your artsy fan base around you you may land up watching the world go by i know you work hard at play perhaps work less hard and then play really fyi was a liberal arts major and is now going to work for a software company in madison wisconsin that is hiring 1000s of workers a year there are jobs out there for smart talented motivated grads i think the company is called epic there are cool artsy folk in your generation working in many young companies across the states and probably right where you are too ian go for it this new year you are 27 now a young man i'd love to see you step up and i'd love to see you share some fun times with us good luck M̄́͐̽̂ͫ́̀̃̽̅̍̎ͮ҉̬̠̝̩͇͉̕Ỏ̧̨͎̰͖̪̟̜̼̱͔̲̦̘̟̻͓̊̎ͭ̏́ͮͮ̆ͯ͊̾M̴̨̧̝̼̼͚͚̮̫̟̯̻͙͙̻͇̰̝͈͆͑͆̓̆̑̇
I Love It When I'm Walking
Written by Alexandra Naughton on January 6, 2013
Arranged by Pirooz Kalayeh on January 13, 2013
i love it when im walking home from work listening to an album i
love on my portable music player and my favorite song comes on and i
spin the wheel to increase the volume but its already on max i
love it when im walking home from work and see a new mural that wasnt there yesterday i
love it when im walking home from work and i
reach in my bag for a pen to jot down a thought in my notebook and accidentally pull out a swisher sweet i
love it when im walking home from work and a drop falls into my eye and i
cant tell if its leftover rain from a tree leaf or air conditioner sweat or a bird peeing or someones spit from an upstairs window i
love it when im walking home from work and i
see the same people waiting at the same intersections i
love it when im walking home from work and as the blocks pass and i
smell the different smells of dinner cooking wafting from the kitchens of apartments and houses low and upscale in the many neighborhoods i
must cross and as the blocks pass i
figure out what we will eat when I get home to you i
love it when im walking home from work and the air is just mild enough that i
can unbutton my jacket and cold enough that im not dripping in sweat by the time i
get home i
love it when im walking home from work and the sun is just fading and some people leave their blinds and curtains open so that i
and others like me can peer into their homes and wonder what kind of people live inside and what do they do and do they argue about silly things and how did they acquire their furniture all at once or sporadically over time i
love it when im walking home from work and no one is hogging the sidewalk
The Prodigal Son Returns
Comments from "Sad Pictures For Children" Kickstarter update
Selected by Nicholas Rutkaus on January 7, 2013 Written by kickstarter.com on January 3, 2013
Arranged by Hunter Payne on January 12, 2013
Selected by Nicholas Rutkaus on January 7, 2013
~*~*~*~the prodigal son returns~*~*~*~
√ i am excited for my wasp
√ i only want a dead wasp
(if it died of natural causes surrounded by its immediate family achieving enlightenment just as the last spark of electricity flickers and leaves its corpse forever, ill have all the dead wasps.)
other people didn't want give me like a hundred dead wasps!!!!!!!!! i'm in favour of dead wasps always!!!!!!!!!
(i'm not so sure here about the dead wasp idea…..)
1.) australia has very strict
("customs regarding animal products especially when", said product.)
is an insect so?
my package may never reach me if customs catches it…
2.) are the wasps found
(or have they been killed specifically for going in the book…)
personally i don't want to fund a project: that involves the death of a couple.
of thousand creatures: for no discernable reason i would prefer to receive:
√ no insect in mine or
√ receive no book at all
(if that is not an option aren't you running into some sort of weird regulations?)
by sending out a book with a dead insect in it, i feel like there's some sort of health controls applicable here! i would.
pay extra for a wasp-less copy?
ding? ding ding?
~*~*~*~threat has been detected~*~*~*~
Vindication Benedict
Written by Elliot Barbernell on January 4, 2013
Arranged by Nicholas Rutkaus on January 10, 2013
▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓
▓▒░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▒▓
▓▒░ vindicationbe/\/\nedict/\/\tamesailorsrubbingalcoholalloveryourb ░▒▓
▓▒░ odytastesli/\/\/\/\/\keitanyway/\/\/\3s/\/\econds/\/\/\lateracru ░▒▓
▓▒░ shedraspberr/\/\yyourf/\/\eetk/\/\/\/\/\/\/\&=/\/\/\/\/\ickupbeh ░▒▓
▓▒░ indyourhead/\/\youpoi/\/\sonb/\/\re/\at/\/\hs/\/\hedoesntwanttok ░▒▓
▓▒░ issyoupois/\/\/\onbr/\/\/\ea/\/\thnoon/\/\edoe/\/\/\/\sfourheads ░▒▓
▓▒░ onthe:sinkwa:shyou:rhan:dsw:ia:l:l:of:the:mwas:terwa:terits:time ░▒▓
▓▒░ tope/\/\ebuddyletthepeebefreesendanemailtoyourteacheryouhadacrus ░▒▓
▓▒░ ho/\/\/\/\/\nine/\/\/\lementar/\/\/\/\yschoo/\/\/\lsenda/\/\/\ne ░▒▓
▓▒░ mai/\/\ltowho/\/\re/\/\moving/\/\yo/\/\ur/\/\/\/\/\sh/\/\/\/\/\o ░▒▓
▓▒░ es/\/\isatal/\/\en/\/\tandit/\/\/\/\take/\/\sskillpl/\/\ayallofy ░▒▓
▓▒░ o/\/\/\llofyo/\/\/\urfavori/\/\tetracksat/\/\/\/\once/\/\/\/\fuc ░▒▓
▓▒░ kaonetrackmindparaesthesia/\/\ofthedrippertossingdirtintoyoureye ░▒▓
▓▒░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▒▓
▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓
My Arm Is Encrusted
Written by Chris Barker on April 17, 2012
Arranged by Andrew Prassas on January 14, 2013
my arm
is encrusted with rough gems
little jewels of blood and flame -
i ask them to leave, to die, but they
persist -
in spite of my insist, my
unintended souvenirs,
souvenirs of a distant
land.
i jumped off the train as it was
still moving.
mister Cocteau,
and found,
something, something - other than life and death.
an atheist limbo
of warmth and rotten corpses,
overpowering smells
of flowers and a chemists sad humor,
all wrapped up in a little brown
capsule of want. a
vicissitude leading to a hell that
doesn't
exist.
anyways!
Yo
Written by Hunter Payne on January 12, 2013
Arranged by Moon Temple on January 13, 2013
yo y o yo y o y o y o y o y o y o y o y o yo yo y o y o yo yo y o
y o y o
fantastic
today confirmed i
you
am
an accident! haha
yes i
you am
so thankful! yes i
you am
so thankful! yes i
you am
so
fully and wholly
thankful!
for holy vows
hips smashed
carrots come next
and paid to play
''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''victim''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''
to process
rewarded by
something ?
youll never see
in
your
my
life
your
my
gut
that thing that makes
you
me
say telescope extension?
and forced to
bleed
more than once
a month
my climax is
standing in line
waiting................................................................................
................................................................................... for
you
me
patiently!
and
quietly!
please
your
my god
please
please
your
my god
please
your
my god
please just take your time
and suck my veins
dry i
you will give it to you
me i will let you
me have your
my every cell
and all of the sudden i
you realize something nobody
knows nobody
knows nobody
knows
what theyre
doing
not a single
person
feel good?
iyou am now
the larger iyou are all
of yourmy accidents
see human its
simple
yourmy only
goal
is to affirm
yourmy life 22
by accident and
its simple, human
just walk around and breathe
I Just Got Annoyed
Written by Willow Watson on January 3, 2013
Arranged by Lexi Roberts on January 8, 2013
"I JUST GOT ANNOYED WITH
SOMEONE ON THE INTERNET
I POSTED THIS MAGICAL VIDEO OF BACON AND EGGS EARLIER THIS SELF RIGHTEOUS BITCH ISFAT AND UNATTRACTIVE ANYWAY YOUR CAST IRON PANS ARE GONNA KILL YOU SHE PUT SUGAR GLIDERS
IN HER TITS REALLY SHUT UP
SHUT THE FUCK UP
ONLY I SAID IT NICER ITS NOT THE SOY BEANS HIGHLIGHTS FROM THE CONVERSATION MY MOM IS HAVING RN"