It's Somehow

Written by Rin Alexander Ascher on April 3, 2008
Arranged by Ian Aleksander Adams on January 15, 2012
Published in Issue 001

it's somehow a very strange

experience when the pupil becomes the master

through keen insight
and
never ending reverence for the craft

staying up late, paying too much,
attention.
when he should be
sleeping.

-

i'm sorry

-

i left my post

-

tonight
I couldn't bear to be
here

any longer staring at your softly rising chest
your ribs like profane history
made by water rushing
over rock slowly
over time creating
this pale

almost. too. white.
canyon wall

I remember when I was a ghost and
I still inspired you but now
my hands have grown.

heavy the skin on my bones; perilously longing to embrace the earth

the voice that once rang
high and melodious

like a bird now, is broken, cracked
and low

like the saddest and largest of bells
she still thinks I'm interesting but
I can never be sure with her
I can't understand how something

so

ethereal

would even notice this

blistered and dry sack
of skin

that keeps ticking away
if only out of spite
she who is developed on your
lens of lenses all across this pattern

knit together through ones and zeroes - look beth a cameo for you, your ringlets of fire then you take
for granted
every
moment
spiting your beauty - like it would come around again, like it was your birthright that you shunned.

for what for

nothing but a lack of self confidence - don't be ridiculous, not
everyone can be charming, not
everyone can be beautiful, so

please just get over

what? you think you aren't?

and

please embrace what everyone else knows.

you are there. isn't any time to lose.
you have to do something
before
your bones turn brittle like mine
you have to do something
before
your milk skin turns into this.

flaky paper that was once bent into airplanes but is now gathered
in impossible gusts of wind and
scattered
like ashes across a fragrant land - this old heart can - no longer

love,